At this stage in their lives, our boys are figuring out some of the hardest but most important lessons: how to be a good friend, how to stand up for what’s right, and how to deal with the tricky moments that come with growing up. Most of these lessons don’t happen in big, dramatic ways - they happen quietly, in the lunch queue, on the playground, or during a group activity. They happen in the everyday choices our boys make about how they treat one another. 

As parents, we have an incredible influence here. The conversations we have at home - sometimes at the dinner table, sometimes during the car ride to school - shape how our sons see kindness and courage in action. 

Our boys often hear messages that tell them being strong means being the toughest or the loudest. But true strength lies in kindness - in noticing when someone’s left out, in choosing to speak gently, in doing the right thing even when it’s not the easy thing. When we praise kindness as much as achievement, we show our boys what real strength looks like. 

Bullying isn’t always obvious. Sometimes it’s the “banter” that crosses a line, the friend who’s always left out of the group, or the teasing that everyone laughs at - but one person doesn’t find funny. Helping our boys recognise these moments gives them the awareness to make kinder choices, or to speak up when something doesn’t feel right. 

It also helps to keep conversations open and gentle. Asking questions like, “Who was kind today?” or “Did you notice anyone being left out?” can spark valuable reflection. These small chats show our boys that it’s safe to talk about friendship worries, about mistakes, or about times when things didn’t go so well. It’s in these moments that they learn empathy and understanding. 

And of course, kindness often calls for quiet courage. Standing up for someone, or choosing not to join in when others are being unkind, can take real bravery. Let’s remind our boys that courage doesn’t have to be loud - it can be as simple as including someone new, or asking for help when something doesn’t feel right. Those small acts can make a huge difference. 

Anti-Bullying Week isn’t just about saying no to bullying - it’s about saying yes to kindness, inclusion, and friendship. Every conversation we have, every story we share, helps our boys grow into the sort of young men who use their strength to lift others up. 

Craig Cuyler
Designated Safeguarding Lead / Director of Wellbeing
Head of PSHEe / Assistant Housemaster (Main School)